- I got married in October, and spent the majority of 2018 planning that gigantic, drunken fiesta. So I was a little MIA, considering I DIY-ed basically the entire goddamn thing (it was 100% worth it).
- There’s a baby in me and it’s due May 12th, which just so happens to be Mother’s Day. For someone with a ridiculously foul mouth and subpar attitude, my life is turning into an incredibly ironic Disney movie, and I’m here for it.
This means one of two things: First, I’ll be reading a shit ton more, that is until I release this child from my womb. I’m incredibly bored already and I still have 4 months to cook this baby. Second of all, although it might be difficult to post as frequently as I’d like to once the baby arrives, I’m thinking about expanding into children’s book reviews as well. Because you damn well know this baby is going to be read to daily, and why not entertain myself and others with vulgar book reviews of the Cat and the Hat? I see no negative repercussions of this. Not a one.
OKAY SO NOW THE IMPORTANT STUFF. I’ve been putting off reading the Six of Crows series since September 29, 2015, to be exact. That was the day Leigh Bardugo blessed the bookworm community with the ingenuity that is Six of Crows and the world physically imploded. However, because of this weird little brain stored inside my head, I refuse to read any book series until all of the books are published. Six of Crows was only one book of a two-part series, and there was no way I was going to put myself through years of torture, pacing a hole in the floor of my newly-finished living room until the sequel was finally released. Not gonna happen, mah boy. And while Leigh Bardugo announced there would eventually be a third installment, it’s set to take place years after the second book. AKA, I truly don’t care about it. I like immediate gratification. Don’t send me decades down the road, I’ll simply refuse to follow.
I started 2019 off the right way: with libro numero uno of the series on my lap and a full plate of lasagna resting atop my ever-growing belly. What an excellent decision this turned out to be. I flew through Six of Crows in a matter of days, cursing myself for not starting it years prior. Here’s a quick synopsis (no spoilers, I’m not rude):
Six of Crows follows a young man by the name of Kaz Brekker, an upcoming member of a gang of incredibly skilled misfits called the Dregs. The story starts when Kaz is offered the incredibly lucrative yet practically impossible job of breaking into an impenetrable prison complex in Fjerda. Here we fucking GO, PEOPLE.
Shit gets real, folks. The most accurate way I’ve described this book is as follows: imagine the pick-pocketing orphans from Oliver Twist attempting to pull off an elaborate, Ocean’s Eleven-type heist. What I mean is that it’s exciting as fuck. Currently, I’m about halfway through the second book and my feelings towards the series have generally stayed the same. And to put a cherry on top of this goddamn literary sundae, Netflix just announced a new TV series based on both books. It turns out I waited just the exact right amount of time to start these bad boys, either that, or Netflix is tapped into my google search history (I recently spent a full three hours burrowing deep amidst the dark web, scouring for articles hinting at a Six of Crows movie, so I’m not fully disregarding the latter).
All in all, I’m glad I finally gave in and read this series. Usually when people are super hyped about certain books, I find myself let down and disappointed. That didn’t happen with Six of Crows and Crooked Kingdom. Click here and here to buy these gems and read them before Netflix releases the show. That way you can sound super smart and tastefully cultured when you tell all your friends the books were better (they always are).
peace & love, homies.
♥G (& the little peanut I’m growing)